Day 26:

 

Day 26 of Nutrisystem 2.0. I feel like I'm settling back into the reality of eating less and exercising more. These are the 2 keys to successful weight loss, no matter what diet or program you may be following. I'm really regretting the 1+ year that I veered off course and let food take over my life again. Honestly, I have no idea why it happened. It's not like life was bad - I wasn't eating for comfort until recently. I guess I just didn't care what I was doing to myself. Sweets are my biggest problem and I am reminded of that every evening when I have my snack before bed. The blast of sweetness from a chocolate cupcake or an ice cream sandwich makes me immediately want more and this is part of the reason having candy in the house is not a good idea for me. A couple of pieces once in a while becomes a handful and then it's all over. I have to eat it until it's gone and make sure I buy more so that I don't run out. Last night I had the same "urge" when I finished my cupcake. But I sat there on the couch and within a short time the urge went away. The lesson for me is I need to give myself time for that urge to pass, instead of jumping to satisfy it. I already do that when it comes to buying things. I will often see things on Amazon I "want" and instead of immediately ordering it, I'll throw it on a list or in my cart. Sometimes I follow through and actually place the order and sometimes the item ends up being removed. It's all about impulse control and I can see I need to work at that. Part of the reason I gave up going to the casino was the fact that I couldn't stop myself from spending every penny in my wallet. Some days I won, but most of the time I didn't and I was throwing away $400 a week. All of my spare cash was going to the casino and I was saving nothing. A few times I withdrew cash from my savings and that was a red flag. I am astonished now to see my bank balance growing so fast, even without the addition of money from my mother's estate. Just as I regret all the pounds I've gained, I regret all the money I threw away. I always said I was only going to the casino every week because that is where my mom wanted to be. It started out that way but over time I enjoyed it just as much as she did and while she was ill it was my escape on weekends. In the end, it was easy to stop going there because it just wasn't the same without her. I felt so sad and lonely and pathetic the last time I was there, seated alone in the bar of the restaurant, watching all the couples and other larger parties pass me by while I ate my dinner. I think about that anytime I get the "urge" to go there, which isn't often. I like seeing all that money in my bank account and I'm in no hurry to spend it.

Breakfast was 160 calorie buttermilk waffles with sugar free syrup and an 80 calorie yogurt. Morning snack was a 120 calorie chocolate shake. Lunch was a 220 calorie pepperoni pizza melt. Afternoon snack was 210 calorie cheese & crackers. I was down to the last 2 pieces of Laughing Cow cheese, which are only 30 calories each so 2 is not enough for my snack. I decided to have 1 of them and a piece of Asiago cheese. I bought these individually wrapped snack size pieces a while back and never ate them. Each is 80 calories, so they're perfect for Nutrisystem. There's probably 20 in the bag so I'll be having them for a while. Dinner was a 250 calorie chicken enchilada with roasted carrots. Evening snack was a 140 calorie chocolate cupcake. Total calories for the day are 1180.

I got up about 8:30 even though I could easily have slept a few more hours. Sundays are the worst day to "sleep in" because then I have trouble getting to sleep and have a hard time getting up for work. I again set a goal to be on the treadmill at noon. Well, about 11 I decided to go to Walmart and I headed there about 11:15, returning at about 12:30. I also dropped off my property tax payment and then spent some time clearing as much of the remaining snow in my driveway as I could. That took me until about 1:10. After putting the groceries away and feeding Abby I sat down to relax with a cup of coffee. I also put my treadmill shoes on - no excuses ! Even though I didn't really "need" anything at the grocery store, I decided to go today because next weekend is going to be very, very cold and I really don't want to go out in that. So now I have enough salad items and frozen veggies to get me through 2 weeks. I forgot to buy riced cauliflower and I'm upset about that, but if I really, really want it I can go right up the street to Top's. I also have plenty of cat food, treats and litter. I'm glad I got all my coffee supplies, because now there is absolutely nothing I need !

When I sat down with my coffee I decided to give myself until 2:30 to get on the treadmill. Well, I ended up sitting there until 4 pm. What's important is that I finally got up and completed the 33 minute walk in the Atlas Mountains. Did I want ? No. Did I think about not doing it. Yes. I could easily have easily justified it in my mind but that is the kind of thing that but me back here. I justified whatever I ate and I justified the lack of exercise. Every day I was going to do something about it "tomorrow", but tomorrow never came. Neither did next week, next month. Losing 150 pounds was the hardest thing I ever did but gaining 87 was easy. I suspect that losing them is going to be harder than the first time around, but I'm in it for the long haul. My life is pretty much going to be 1200 calories a day and exercise every day, for probably the rest of my life. Once I was done in the mountains, I decided to give myself until 7 pm to get back on the treadmill for workout #2. Both of my workouts are with iFit trainer Tommy Rivs, who is on a journey of his own. He's fighting back from a 2 year bout with cancer that nearly killed him. The Atlas Mountains walk was filmed several years ago, while he was in his prime, and the Mexico walks I'm doing with him are Part 1 of his road to recovery series. I actually completed this series back in February 2022 but I felt like it was a good series to help ME on the road to recovery ! So about 7 pm I got back on the treadmill for workout #2. It was just over 12 minutes so I used the same settings as yesterday - 3 minutes at 2.6, 3 at 2.8, 3 at 3 and 3 at 3.2 mph. 

Yay me .. I made it through the weekend without eating more than I should have and I got 2 workouts in both days !!! The snow shoveling today burned some extra calories for sure ! I'm really hoping to see a 2 pound loss when I weigh myself on Wednesday, which is the start of a new month. I would love to see 234 on the scale because that puts me back at 70 pounds and means I have earned back the 70 pound bear and cans start working towards the 80 pound one ! 

It's been a good weekend and I'm tired, so I'm heading for bed.