Day 51: Staying The Course

 

Day 51 of Nutrisystem 2.0 dawned early and quiet. The snow had stopped when I got up and we got a plowable amount, but nowhere near the 9 inches they said we might get. I'd say there was maybe 4 inches outside and it was the heavy wet stuff. I woke up at 6:30 and actually got up ! I could easily have tried dozing until the alarm at 7 but I did have to pee and I'm trying to get in the habit of getting up when I wake up, provided it's a reasonable hour. So today started off on a positive note! By the time my alarm went off at 7 I had already made the bed, fed the indoor and outdoor cats and brewed my first cup of coffee ! The temp outside was about 29 and the house was perfectly warm. I did turn the heat up yesterday because the downstairs just seemed too cold. I had the thermostat set on 70 but bumping it up to 72 made a huge difference. I didn't need to run the electric heater in my office at all today.

Breakfast was 160 calorie buttermilk waffles with sugar free syrup and an 80 calorie yogurt. Morning snack was a 120 calorie vanilla shake. Lunch was a chef salad and 220 calorie pepperoni pizza melt. Afternoon snack was 160 calorie cheese & crackers. I finally finished the Asiago cheese bites ! They had a "use by" date of April 2021, so I'm glad to see them go ! Next up is a block of cheese I bought at the NY State Fair in August, then I'll start on the 2 pound block of cheddar I bought at Costco. Then .. no more cheese ! I'll go back to cottage cheese and crackers or fruit. Dinner was roasted carrots and 260 calorie roasted turkey medallions. Evening snack was a 140 calorie chocolate cupcake. Total calories for the day are 1140, but the huge glass of wine (see below) puts me over 1200.

First workout of the day was 33 minutes in the Atlas Mountains. I'm still working with my 2.5 to 2.8 mph speeds for this one. As I approached the 28 minute mark I was getting tired but how can you stop when you're so close to the finish ?!?!? I survived and made it to the end. After work I went out and cleared some snow out of the driveway that had fallen off the roof right after the driveway was plowed ! The driveway is a sheet of ice and it's clear that after last night snow we must have had freezing rain. After I was done with that I hit the treadmill for just under 16 minutes in Spain. It's ironic - the Atlas Mountains workout was filmed long before Tommy Rivs got sick but when I see him in the Spain workouts, which are part 2 of his recovery series, he looks just the same. All he was missing was his endurance and stamina ... which is exactly what *I* am missing, but for different reasons. Cancer struck him down but I'm a victim of my own poor decisions. Regardless, we are both working our way back from "something" .. and he often points that out. Today they announced part 3 of his Road to Recovery series will be released Monday. It was filmed in Italy so I'm looking forward to that ! I got my 60 minutes on the treadmill today, along with a bonus workout shoveling snow so it was a good day for fitness !

I forgot to mention that Tuesday night I had such pain in my left hip and knee that I had to take some aspirin in order to get comfortable enough to sleep. My hip has bothered me in the past but the knee pain is new. Welcome to middle age, the home of aches and pain ! The aspirin took care of the pain pretty quickly and I've been fine ever since. It may have just been a reaction to the fact that I hadn't exercised in 3 days. This is another good reason to exercise every day because it keeps the joints lubricated !

My work day wasn't as productive as I'd have liked, but that's because I'm working on the preliminary stages of a lot of things. That is always slow and tedious work. I also had to spend some time rebuilding my worklist. It's like my Bible and I cannot function without it, so I will definitely be taking better care of it ! I also picked up a few new items from my boss and had my annual salary discussion today. I got the best raise I think I've ever had (over $4k) and my bonus is nearly $8k ! Now that I don't go to the casino, my savings balance will be continuing to grow ! 

I just read a news story that the guy who first tried to fix my heat in November was killed in a car accident today. He didn't fix the problem and basically ripped me off for $480, but I'd never wish this fate on anyone. He's the brother in law of the guy who plows my driveway and mows my lawn, so I plan to reach out to him tomorrow to offer my condolences. Doug lost his wife in November and now this .. poor guy ! His brother in law did come to my rescue back in 2016 when my sump pump died, so he wasn't a bad guy. He was only 52 and that is just too young.

In celebration of my phenomenal appraisal, raise and bonus I had a huge glass of wine with my dinner tonight. Note: I made this decision before I read the news about my heating guy being killed. I have a big wine glass so it took about 3/4 of the bottle .. lol .. and boy did I ever feel it ! I was yawning before 7 pm, so I think I'll sleep good tonight ! I do not drink often so the alcohol usually goes right to my head ! Tonight was no exception ! When I went upstairs to take my shower I could tell I was definitely tipsy - not a feeling I enjoyed !

As has been the case most of this winter, the predicted storm ended up not being that bad in my area. I am grateful for that ! We didn't get any more snow today but there is a chance of freezing rain tonight and snow every day for the next few days. Seems like nothing major is forecast, so that is good. It doesn't much matter to me because I have plenty of food, but I feel for those who do have to be out driving in these winter messes. Being free of that anxiety has done wonders for my mental health.

During my evening workout Tommy Rivs said something very profound and of course I couldn't remember what it was, so I had to sit here on the couch listening to the workout. I really felt like I needed to capture it and remember it. He said he focuses on being a little bit better each day, improving a little bit each day. He quoted East of Eden character "Lee", who was an Asian servant. Lee said to someone "Now that you no longer have to be perfect, you can be good." Pretty profound to me, because I wring my hands over not being perfect - all the time ! Perfection is an unreachable goal, for most all of us - me included ! I know that, yet I continually strive for it. Having that expectation does nothing but destroy any self confidence you might have, because you will always fail at being perfect ! I try to give myself credit for the good days but it is always negated by beating myself up for the bad days. It doesn't matter if I'm "good" 5 out of 7 days - those 2 days that I'm not "good" cancel out any sense of achievement I might have had for the 5 good days. I work pretty hard at Nutrisystem all week and the fact that I go off the rails on weekends (too often) is just destroying me. It's all I think about, yet I keep doing it. I used to look forward to the weekends but I dread them now because I don't trust myself to stick to my diet & exercise goals. I just need to get through ONE weekend successfully. I feel like that will help keep me on track. Will this weekend be the one ? I don't know. I hope so.

On that note, I'm heading to bed !