Day 85: Stop Looking Back

 

Today is day 85 of Nutrisystem 2.0 and it was COLD this morning, to the point that I did not want to get out of my nice warm bed. It was 24 at 7 am and only 30 by 1 pm. It was a mostly sunny day, so there is that ! It was only 33 at 6 pm and the low tonight is 24 again. The high for Saturday is 63 but the low is 22 .. figure that one out !

Breakfast was waffles and a yogurt. Morning snack was a vanilla shake. Lunch was a chef salad and pepperoni pizza melt. Afternoon snack was cottage cheese & oatmeal cookies. Dinner was roasted carrots and rotini with meatballs. Evening snack was a strawberry shortcake cupcake. 

First workout of the day was 21m51s in Italy. For this one I set the speed to 3 mph for 21 minutes. This speed is getting easier ! I huff and puff some when I first get going but I settle into it and by the end I am breathing normally. My starting speed used to be 3.2 mph and I'd work up to 3.7 by the end of each workout, so I still have a long way to go to get back to that. I'm trying and I'm seeing progress and that is all that matters. After work was 22m56s in Italy. I started at 2.4 mph and at 20 minutes to go I set the speed to 2.5 mph and added 0.1 mph every 2 minutes until I got to 10 minutes to go. At this point I reduced the speed by 0.1 mph every 2 minutes, ending the workout at 2.5 mph. There was some 4% and 6% incline in this workout, so it was no joke ! Third and final workout was another one in Italy and I started at 2.2 mph but increased to a steady speed of 2.4 mph for this one. iFit glitched during the workout and even though I finished, it did not record it as a completed workout. Bummer ! I ran it on my phone unpaired for a few minutes just to get credit for it in my stats. I was feeling a little weak afterwards so I ate the remains of the loaf of Irish soda bread that I bought Sunday, since it was sitting here on the end table next to the couch. This recovery series in Italy with Tommy Rivs is amazing because I feel like I am also on a recovery journey and sometimes I swear he is speaking directly to me. During my 3rd workout (which I did after writing a good part of this blog), he talks about not comparing where you are today or what you are capable of today with where you were before or what you were able to do before. That struck me because I was lamenting the fact that by the 90 day mark I had lost over 40 pounds the first time around with Nutrisystem. That was then, this is now was pretty much the message. I struggled hard in the beginning of this latest journey because I could not manage the treadmill pace that I used to do. It took me a long time to accept that and start doing what I could do. Only then was I able to start working my way back. The fact that I can sustain 3 mph is huge but that is just the beginning. I pulled out the sheets I had made with the timeframes for each workout and the planned speeds. I used to start at 3.2 mph and end at 3.7 mph and some workouts were close to an hour. I also used 3% and 4% inclines to intensify the workouts. I think I used to start at 4% then drop to 3% when I got to 3.5 mph. Those were the days ! I can get that back if I keep working at it. The more weight I lose the easier it will be.

Work was productive but not super busy and I'm taking advantage of the lull by working on some not so hard or not so urgent projects. Mostly the tedious stuff that I don't really enjoy. My boss sent me over 6 new projects and I'll get those out the door tomorrow. They're easy but the documentation I have to compile for each one is what takes the most time. My goal is to have them all done by lunch time .. we'll see how I do !

I guess the casino is missing me - for the first time ever I got a call from a real live person inviting me to a giveaway at Turning Stone ! It's during the week and it's for a backpack, so I have zero interest. For April they bumped my free play up to $100 but my casino vouchers (good for food, etc) is only $20. They used to give me $200 a month. The free play is tempting, but I really don't want to fall back into that habit.

I'm doing well on my diet and exercise right now today and I feel like I'm finally settling into a routine. I firmly believe the change in the weather has a lot to do with it. We're getting a lot more sunshine and I feel like, for me, it makes a big difference. Whatever it is, I'm happy to be doing better and I'm more hopeful about getting a significant amount of these 87 pounds off by the time I go to Disney. I'm nearly 90 days in and I'm really disappointed with where I am, so it can only get better ! The first time around I lost over 40 pounds in the first 90 days, but I had a lot more weight to lose and at the time I was scared I was going to have to find a new job, so getting the weight off was a lot more important. The Disney trip has given me something tangible to work towards and I feel like this is helping with my motivation. I could absolutely lose all of the weight by 12-3 if I stay buckled down and work hard. Easter will be the next challenge for me, because we always have too many desserts. I was assigned deviled eggs because everyone likes the way I make them. It's nothing fancy - I just mix the egg yolks with mayo, a little garlic powder, onion powder, salt, pepper and some mustard.

Today will be the third day that I've stuck to my schedule. The weekend is going to be the test but the shorter workouts that I'm doing right now should make it easier to keep on track. I do have the 36 minute Mount Kilimanjaro hike on the schedule Saturday, along with 2 Italy walks so that will be a challenge for sure. I think I am ready for Mount Kili - the average pace is 2.7 mph but there is a lot of incline in the first half, so it is no easy stroll on the Savannah ! Saturday is supposed to be rainy so I won't be taking my freshly washed car out ! Sunday looks to be dry so I will grocery shop then. Saturday will be a good day to work out and also do some chores around the house. 

It's about time for me to stop looking back at where I was and focus on where I am now and where I want to go. Getting to the point where I can comfortably walk at 3 mph was no easy task but I did it. I don't feel so hopeless anymore. At one time I wondered if I would ever "get back to where I was". I'm making progress every day and that is what matters. It took a long time to get to the point where I could walk up to 3.7 mph so thinking I could just jump right in to that was stupid. I've learned the hard way just how fast your fitness gains can be lost. That's something else that Tommy Rivs talked about - consistency. He said you can't just reach a goal and then sit back. That's exactly what I did. I hit my goal weight and then got cocky and stupid. So here I am now. Wearing my plus sized clothes and hating the way I look and feel. 

On that note, I'm heading to bed !